Why does everyone hate Chris Berman so much?

A Sports Baron Exclusive by Al Davis, Jr.

Cameras caught a slimmer – albeit slightly – Chris Berman at this year’s MLB All-Star game. Rumors abound that the NFL Primetime vet will start hawking Nutrisystem. In the blogosphere, Berman’s pitchman gig set of the latest round of Berman Bashing. Check out the commenters on The Big Lead’s Nutrisystem post.

It is no secret that Berman is a pompous bully. Yes, he is corpulent. No, he’s not the prodigy he thinks he is. Yes, Boomer is an ass. No, he hasn’t said anything innovative since we asked the barber to cut our hair like Zach Morris’.

Yes, sweat from rimming Brett Favre probably trickles over Berman’s neck fat into his pilose, ottoman-sized ass.

But I digress. Give the guy a break. Who doesn’t like Berman and Tom Jackson frothing at the mouth over highlights? I’ve heard it 1,000 times, but I laugh when he says ‘the frozen tundra of Laaaaambauuuuuu Fieeeeeeeeld,’ the ‘Raaaaaaaaaidas’ or ‘Rumblin’, bumblin’, stumblin’!!’ Don’t you?

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10 Comments

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10 responses to “Why does everyone hate Chris Berman so much?

  1. I agree he is no Stu Scott, who is the symbol of everything that is wrong with the world and ESPN. Would it be possible to have Stu exiled to “Titletown” when that mind numbing segment ends once football returns?

  2. Al Davis Jr

    Stu scott has the talent to host an open mic in rural Gorgia – but only on a good day.

  3. SON Fan

    I like Chris Berman I might be one of the people who don’t get tired of his nicknames.

  4. IHATEBERMAN

    I cannot stand Berman, he needs to upgrade his wardrobe, lose the gold ring and hire a golf coach. He is worse then Madden and that is tough to do, he needs to step aside and let someone else take over. I bet he is rude in person and tries to hit on women way out of his league.

  5. Jason

    Wish he would retire or get fired. Just can’t stand to see or hear him anymore. Or maybe, not be on ESPN everytime I watch tv. Don’t much like Stu Scott either, but he is not on tv every 5 min. anymore like he was a couple of years ago.

  6. Nealio

    Chris Berman made an absolutely rock-stupid comment about soccer that I found to be offensive. I don’t ever want to delve inside that egomaniac’s head, but there is something wrong with a guy who can’t resist dissin the most popular sport in the world. Maybe that’s the issue? He has no influence, no one can appreciate his sophomoric plays-on-names in the soccer world…because he’s too ignorant to name any except maybe “Pay-Lay?”

    The difference between him and Joe Buck, and Bob Costas are like the difference between Gretchen Bundchen and the skank selling her worn-out, gross package at the seamiest corners of the seamiest neighborhood in the seamiest of cities. Which paradigm demands that sports commentors behave like grammar-challenged, pimply 14-year-old know-it-alls with crushes on themselves? Thank God Joe Buck and Bob Costas exude class; Berman probably thinks “class” is for losers.

    When they kick his ass out of ESPN, I would love to see him approaching the exit door, at which point I’d say, “He…could….go…..all…..the…..waaaaaaay!”

  7. mount bikr

    take a breath you moron. you sound like a constipated grizzly bear. Actually, you look like one too.

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